Letter # 8: To the person who deleted me as a friend in facebook
As the Facebook notification states before you delete a friend: “This cannot be undone.”
The better promise is this: “(Name of “friend”) will not be notified”. Well, they won’t be notified, but that doesn’t mean that they would never find out.
So dear person-who-deleted-me-as-a-friend-in-facebook,
Though I simply laugh at the thought of what you did, I still write you this letter because I think that somehow, you deserve it.
I didn’t know what was going on in your mind when you decided to click that button. Weird. First of all, I’ve never quite gotten the grasp of why people delete friends in Facebook, (well except of course for the people you don’t know but somehow find their way into your “friend” list) Second of all, what the hell did I do to you? Hahaha.
Did I break your heart? – NO
Did I punch you in the face? – NO
Did I kick your balls? – NO
Did I steal your lunch money? – NO
Did I steal your “girlfriend”? – NO
Did I confront you about your issues with me before? – Hell yeah! It was even an attempt to patch things up. But well, you just had to do it and believe the promise of Facebook that re-assures you that I will not be notified and that I will not know.
There might have been others who deleted me as a friend already, but the hell do I care with that. It just so happened that I found out about this and unfortunately I, and my close friends, know why you did it. Let me give you some unsolicited advice: “Sorry man, but you have to learn how to let that thing die down. It has consumed you already. So move on.”
The sad thing about your move is that Facebook won’t delete me in your life (that’s why I just don’t delete friends even though I might not actually like them). Oh you’ll get to see me around and when that happens, I promise you it will be awkward and there’s a chance that it might be nice.
Don’t worry though:
I won’t break your heart
I won’t kick your balls
I won’t steal your lunch money
I won’t steal your girlfriend
I’ll just probably remind you of what you did, smile, then go ahead. (Because remember that between the two of us, I handle awkward situations better. 😀 )
It’s going to be fun (for me).
P.S. On second thought, if I’m in a good mood when I see you, I might just acknowledge your presence and say nothing. Pray that it happens. 🙂
P.S.S. Did deleting me as a friend give you an orgasm?
P.S.S.S. Sorry for the harshness of this post. I will resume my loving/senti letter writing tomorrow. 😀